If you want proof that Americans work too much, there are articles abound. The drawbacks far outweigh the benefits (which are often, simply making a living); we’re tired, less healthy, and experiencing more stress and anxiety because of it. But there’s another domino along the line of effects of our hectic schedules: the pressure we put on the little off-time we do have.
Whether it’s a vacation “off the grid”, a simple social media detox, finally using those PTO days so they don’t expire, or the holidays with family, we have so much to accomplish in the small handful of days that we aren’t checking in with work. Take, even, an average weekend—what should be time to rest and rejuvenate is filled to the brim with chores: grocery shopping and meal prep, laundry and cleaning, personal errands and appointments, you know what I’m saying. Try to add in a social gathering or date, making up for the sleep deficit gained during the work week, and we’re all asking, “where did the weekend go? No, seriously. Where?” Self care Sunday is less like a modern Sabbath and more like a long shower and a couple hours vegging out in front of our TV or phone, because we don’t have time or energy for much else.
Imagine taking an actual vacation during a time like this. Something you look forward to for weeks or even months. Every person I talk to before a vacation always says something along the lines of, I hope this is really relaxing, I really need this. I hope to come back feeling refreshed! And a lot of times, we want to come back to our jobs with more enthusiasm and energy—we hope that not only will our vacation rejuvenate us, but that it will give us super powers to make us better at work!
Everyone agrees that vacations should be vacations. Your coworkers, your boss, says sign off! Have fun! Yet, that doesn’t stop work from piling up to an amount that makes it actually more enjoyable to do during vacation than coming back to afterward.
Let’s take my recent 10-day road trip up the West Coast, a trip in my head for years and being planned in the months leading up to fall of this year. As the weeks inched closer, the vacation “to dos” in the back of my mind expanded: Get in as many proper night’s rest as possible. Ground myself in nature in a way that I can’t in the city (at least for long)—basically, get my fill of the quiet, natural world. Take as many slow, deep breaths of fresh air as possible. Rekindle my relationship with my partner. Mull over the state of my business and how to get inspired as we move into the new year. See one of my favorite cities and explore everything that has changed in the past few years of my absence. Try every new restaurant. Climb every vista. Stop on every turn-out along Highway 1. Sit with my anxiety long enough for it to pass by. Write. Think. Talk. Chill. Recharge. Heal. “Fill my cup.” Emerge from vacation to life average, pouring that cup bone-dry, let it sit for another month or year or two before there is enough time off to replenish again.
Is there a solution to this?
I’ve worked with many wellness professionals on their digital marketing and content, and from what I’ve learned the best strategy is to find ways to do all of these things in the every day. It is of course not advised to drive yourself to the brink of burnout, then expect a long weekend or holiday or even two-week vacation will bring you back to life. So you must find ways to manage your wellness even in your “on time”.
But that doesn’t take from the fact that we desperately need more “off-time”. Off from both our work and our digital lives (which for people like me are one in the same). Off from the pressure not only to perform but to rest, grow, and heal.
There is not only pressure in succeeding but unwinding, and now our off-time bursts with the competing desires of them both.
Mid-day stretches and therapy sessions tame the symptoms, they don’t treat. We need to shift our priorities, if we ever want to feel “ourselves” again. If we ever want our off time to simply be time off, we need to find a way to work that makes it possible.
